As I write this, I am gearing up for a big holiday weekend. As you read it, I am likely somewhere in the woods, bathed in sweat and bug spray.
With any luck, there is a s’more in my future.
Ah, camping; a.k.a., going into the woods to do all of the same chores you have to do at home, but doing them in an unsanitary environment and with fewer conveniences. Sleeping on the ground in a leaky tent; freezing while trying to start a fire; using the bathroom in a hole in the woods; bathing in a creek; cooking beans in a can over an open fire …
Nah, I’m just messing with you. That’s what camping was like in the old west. This here is modern times, partner. I sleep in a camper with a queen-sized bed, running water, air conditioning and for the record, a fully flushable toilet. We cook our meals on a gas grill or an electric smoker and put the leftovers in the refrigerator. We have wifi.
That’s how we rough it in the woods.
However, we are one of the poorer campers at our preferred campground. We have an older camper that doesn’t sport many of the amenities enjoyed by the other brave souls roughing it in the woods over the holiday weekend.
For instance, we don’t have recliners, flat screen televisions or a fully functioning outdoor kitchen. One awesome camper actually has a projection television and he built a huge viewing screen in the woods. We’re good friends with him now. But then, so is everyone else in the campground.
We’re currently without hot water in our camper, so we actually do have to walk a few feet to the shower house to wash up. Last time we went camping, we forgot to take s’more ingredients, so that was pretty tough. And we seriously have to walk 100 feet up the road just to watch the projection television, so unlike most of the others, we are really going savage out there.