Hendricks County Flyer, Avon, IN

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January 1, 2014

Happy new year anyway

New Year’s has never been high on my list of holidays.

I know there are people out there who love nothing more than ringing out the old and ringing in the new, but I’m not among them. Maybe my ringer’s busted.

Most years I’ve had my glass of celebratory ginger ale and made my way to bed LONG before the celebratory ball drops at Times Square and the celebratory gunfire begins in my neighborhood. I’m not exactly Mr. Wild And Crazy Kiss At Midnight Party Animal, is what I’m trying to say.

I guess I just have too many issues, beginning with the fact that New Year’s had always seemed kind of arbitrary to me. Who decided Jan. 1 ought to commence the year? Did they take a vote? Why wasn’t I notified? Isn’t this unconstitutional? Didn’t the Founding Fathers have something to say about this? Where is it written that the new year starts in January and not, say, the middle of April?

Like I said, issues.

Given the chance, I would argue for a New Year’s that made more sense. For example, if it has to be this time of year, why not start it on the winter solstice, the shortest day of the year? You know, start small and work your way up to the rest of the year.

Or how about the day AFTER the winter solstice? Let the days dwindle down until the very last one when we’re only getting a few hours of daylight, and then PRESTO! We turn the calendar and they start getting long again, Happy New Year.

Even better, why not start the year with the spring equinox? That would be a nice, fresh beginning. The old year dies with winter and then PRESTO! the new year comes in all sweet and green and lovely.

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