Hendricks County Flyer, Avon, IN

Commentary

May 24, 2013

Let them eat bugs

Every year you hear people saying, “If only it would get cold enough and snow enough in the winter. Then we wouldn’t have so many bugs.”

Well I have to tell you, these people are full of bull pucky. It was cold enough and we had plenty of snow this past winter, in my opinion, and the bugs are already out of control. Bees, wasps, gnats, flies, mosquitoes, centipedes and spiders are running rampant.

I know what some of you smarmy people are thinking. A spider is not an insect. It’s an arachnid. Well, hah! I didn’t say insect. I said bug. If it has several legs and crawls uninvited into my house, it bugs me. As do people who say things like that, so arachnid off.

Thankfully, the United Nations has devised a plan to end the bug problem and simultaneously cure world hunger. Even those of you who are still smarting over the whole arachnid business can probably figure out where this is going. That’s right; the powers that be are suggesting that we simply eat them.

The United Nations Food and Agriculture Organization recently released a paper titled “Edible Insects: Future Prospects for Food and Feed Security.” The paper essentially argues that A) insects pack a lot of protein; B) starving people should eat them; C) all governments should encourage insect eating; and D) bugs are less flatulent than cows.

Yes, not only will eating bugs get rid of the bug problem and cure world hunger, according to the paper, it is also good for the environment!

The U.N. is really pulling out all stops to persuade people to think that this is a good idea. They even say something to the effect of, “Hey, the people that live in a village in the Tukanoan jungle in Colombia eat insects. Why can’t the rest of us?”

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