Hendricks County Flyer, Avon, IN

Commentary

June 19, 2014

A throne by any other name …

“It’s time to get serious about what happens in the bathroom.” Have you heard this commercial? It always irritates me. Nobody gets that serious about their toilet paper, do they?

I didn’t think so, but we’ve lived in our current house for nearly 20 years and it’s time to start replacing things, so we are in the market for a new toilet. During this quest for the perfect throne, I have discovered that some people are very serious about what goes on in the bathroom.

I wasn’t looking for anything fancy. I don’t need gold inlays or etched designs. I may splurge and get one of those cushie seats or something, but all in all I didn’t plan to spend more than $200. That is until I did a search online. That’s when I realized how serious some people are about what happens in the bathroom. It seems many people take the term throne quite seriously.

For example, did you know that toilets have names? Of course you can get a basic American Standard, but you might want to opt for one that has a classier name like the Santa Rosa, the Cimarron or the Wellworth Classic.

The Black Vogue Vitreous China runs about $300 and the White San Raphael Vitreous China is about $800. I’m not sure what the difference is besides the color. We may need to call someone about that because that is just wrong.

Then I discovered the Neorest 600. (Cue angelic singing and mystical lights). The Neorest, produced by bathroom fixture manufacturer Toto, is a tankless, one-piece toilet and it is much loved by those fond of being green because it conserves water by using only 1.6 gallons down the drain per flush. But you won’t miss the powerful flush because you’ll be too busy enjoying all the Neorest has to offer.

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